My Malgorzata--Her Husband's Tribute in Full

Andrzej has just given me permission to post his letters. I am doing so here, at the bottom. Plus, a photo of Malgorzata and their home about an hour outside of Warsaw.

Dear Phyllis,

It was Tuesday 17 June, it was almost four o’clock in the afternoon, Małgorzata had already translated two articles, prepared dinner for three days, we had planned texts for Wednesday, she was sitting at her computer, checking messages, she called me over to show me something funny. I returned to my side of the desk, two minutes later I looked up to tell her something and I saw her taking her last breath. She didn't have time to complain, she probably didn't feel any pain. Call it a beautiful death. We had been planning our joint suicide for a long time. Medicines prepared. I repeated "not yet". She replied: you will die first and I will stay with all problems.

We had been a couple since March 1967. In June we were sure that Israel's days were numbered, Małgorzata was ruined, I consoled her, came up with some stupid scenarios, and at the same time I was afraid that Israel had no chance. On Tuesday, a few hours before she died, we were sitting on the verandah, talking about Israel's incredible operation in Iran. I said, so far so good, but it's not over yet. She replied: let me enjoy the fun of the incredible.

We both studied sociology, we were friends for four years before we became a couple. You know, over 60 years ago we were students. Among the many attractive girls, one stood out - she was more tempting for her beautiful mind than just her looks. Małgorzata fascinated me with the way she framed questions. With the quality of her inquiries. Talking to her was a feast, not because she knew the answers, but precisely because she was never satisfied with ready-made ones. And why did she choose me? Maybe because I admired her. Maybe because of my nature - a fool who turned everything into a joke. There were few days when I didn’t manage to make her burst out laughing.

Love,

Andrej

And, when I asked for more information, he sent me this.

Dear Phyllis,

Of course you may use my email. (Correcting my awkward English.) Małgorzata's mother came from western Ukraine (which was then part of Poland). She was a communist, like many Polish Jews. In 1939 the Russians were resettling the Polish (and Jewish) population to distant republics. Małgorzata was born in 1943 in Kyrgyzstan. She never met her father, because he was killed on the front fighting in the Red Army. They returned to Poland in 1947, to Warsaw. Her mother (a wonderful woman) worked in the Ministry of Culture, and communism was beaten out of her head in the way you know well from Kabul. Why did Małgorzata choose sociology? For the same reason as I did, because of the lack of knowledge that it is a pseudoscience. Thanks to this we found each other, or rather I was sent by a professor to a student who was working on the same problem as I was and he suggested that we write a seminar paper together. We became close friends, but we started dating four years later.

We left for Sweden in 1971, Małgorzata did studies for social workers there, and (stupid me) I tried twice for a doctorate, but it turned out (even then) that the entire humanities are dominated by the woke idiots (my dean was a maoist). Małgorzata has a strict, I would say legal, mind and was very appreciated in her work, I did various things, worked as a translator, cleaner, etc. In the end, however, I got a job at the Institute of Economic History and all the time I wrote articles on the emigration press and (less) in the Swedish press. In 1986 I got a job at the BBC (Polish Section). In England, Małgorzata started to translate books from English into Polish (mostly popular science about evolution). We returned to Poland in 1998, when I had had enough of the BBC and retired early. I am sending photos of Małgorzata, our house and our orchard.

Love,

Andrzej